The 'Laws of Love & Companionship'

Written with love..

I have to be honest with you, where I am now, who I am with is all because I believed in love; I believed in myself. It was not easy knocking on the doors of commitment, nor is this journey but I fell in love with my best friend. I love him. We love each other and our relationship is growing every day. This blog post is filled with love. If you want to read it while wearing the lens of 'intentional love' then you will be bamboozled by the time that so easily passes you by. A scenario where love is often seen as a burden than a beautiful adornment of accomplishments.

If you wish to read it while sharing an optical lens of perspective and compromise, you'll find yourself and your partner growing exponentially, as you two find happiness in yourselves and one another. If you need a comparison; a possible comparison to the thoughts that provoke my mind, than put all your raw fruits into a basket and expect them to ripen with an unforgettable sweetness. I'm telling you now, love is not easy and no one will tell you when you'll fall in love or when you'll make the right entrance to meet the right person. It will simply happen. 

And so it did..

Our expressions shared with my sisters after we had completed the religious ceremony. Yes, Ayaz also wears a veil. The veil signifies a holy union in a sacred space.

It took us seconds to agree to dating overseas as young adults with no financial backing except our part time jobs and a pocket full of hope. 

How was this possible? What would my parents think of me? I had found someone, was he really there for me? Was this love? Long distance relationships, heard of them but do they work? If so, I'm not traveling anywhere so how do we meet?

It began in the start of Fall 2006, Ayaz and I reconnected during the month of Ramadan. We were both on separate ends of the world, yet, we celebrated together. I try to remember the day where I sprawled onto my bedroom floor while reading his emails on our bond and how he felt about me. I told myself this was it, after all I am a die hard hopeless romantic. I had to use Abu's HP laptop as what I read next would change my life evermore. As we grew fonder of one another, we continued pursuing our dreams, and days turned into weeks and weeks into months. He was in a bee-hive industry (fashion, media, new company launches) the network was competitive and he loved working. He was the right fit and found security quickly. My adversities were a combination of dreadful commutes, proposal requests, and what was the start of my chronic anxiety, which I thought was major stress from school, and not having the right finances to complete my assignments. I would always make Ayaz a priority as he was my best friend and someone who I could confide in when it came to inspiration, family, and a lover's quest for union (the calling cards didn't matter). I had an array of friends (gosh I miss University) who supported my class assignments. Curatorial periods were my favourites as everyone was bewildered by my projects expressing 'distance, reflection, allegiance, enigma' and I wished I had experienced more time expressing how I had felt visually. "Saira, you can change the way someone feels .." they all said it, they still do.

This is a traditional ceremony during the engagement in Islam called the Imam Zamin. We wear the names of Ali and Fatima on our upper right arms to acknowledge their blessings on this beautiful day. 

LAW Number One:

• Don't be afraid to take a chance. If you're dating online for the first time, chances are that you two have mutual friends. The world is quite saturated with humans from all walks of life, but chances are you two have shared some vital information online where your social networks have scouted you to meet. So why not? 

​I would be traveling to and from OCAD University while making long distant calls using my lunch funds at times because speaking to him would fill my appetite. Of course my mother helped packed my lunch and devoted her time to her three daughters as she worked and managed a loving space in our homes.  My mother is a special make to the lineage of women here on earth, who I will speak to about later in these blog periods. 786.

LAW Number Two:

• You need a substantial support group to keep you going as you two are not enough for one another. We were made as pairs, sure, why not. But I believe that we were made to live loving ourselves with the abundance of great company and a companion to share our worldly perspectives with. They two are given fairness to share what they wish to and love themselves unconditionally. Why does your mind float to a world of fixed notions? Create your own world of love's regulations. I am so humbled by the support that I had of my friends and his friends who we trusted to know better when we didn't. They provided us with strength and immunity. Thank you to all those who did and are still here with us. Family, we forever love you.

He had just proposed but my uncle asked him to propose again in front of everyone. 

More on the Laws of Love & Companionship next week..
Please leave your questions and comments (filled with love) below. 
Thank you again for loving the BRIDAL CULTURE BLOG.

If you would like to have us write your stories, you can always email Saira at breathofhenna@gmail.com.

Thanking Liat Aharoni and Windy Chiu.